imnotme25

Dear past me, It doesn't get better. But try to stay strong. Unlike books, she leaves in the end. She hasn't come back either. I wonder if she even loved us? Unlike books, no one comes to sweep you off your feet. You have to be your own hero. You won't cry much anymore, because you just simply can't.  Keep those smiles up, keep faking your way through the day. Yea, you're still fat. Even with working out, you're still fat. Your grades are horrible too. Don't even bother to draw anymore, they still suck. You won't get better at writing either. Here's a word of advice, put your music in, keep it loud, focus on breathing, and don't let them see

Waking up, the moon caressing your skin, holding you gently, I watch you breathe softly. Blankets sprawled, hair's a mess, but it doesn't matter. You're here, and that's all I care about. I gently run my fingers through your soft brown hair, I outline your lips, slightly parted, I rub my thumb across your check. Still in disbelief, how did I get so lucky? The most beautiful girl, in and out, laying right next to me. I thank God everyday. You're the reason, I want to wake every day. You're the last thing on my mind, as I fall asleep with a smile on my face. You're the reason, I'm still here.

What have I done with my life? where did all of the magic go? Kissing you was like kissing a wall. nothing like hers. Your hugs are nothing special, Talking to you is boring, You just have a nice face. I fell apart, so I tried to make myself feel again. You were there, but there were no butterflies. No fireworks. Not even a slight spark. I can't do this. I can't pretend. I don't want to anymore. I just want her back. But she doesn't want me.

This is my good bye to you. Just you. You may think it strange, but you must admit it's been heading this way for a while. We use to laugh and talk. Having meaningless conversations. I use to stay up late just to hear your voice, to hear your laugh. But now it's all gone. You, you like fell off the face of the Earth. And I miss you. But I can't do this anymore. I can't stay hung up if you won't. I try so hard to be in your life, but you're not even in mine. It kills me to say it, but why can't I make you happy? I just want to please you. To make you proud, but I'm not that person. I want you to find the happiness you deserve. I'll be here

I fell apart again last night. You wouldn't know though. It seems to be happening a lot lately. Don't you worry though. I'll take care of myself. When you see me again, I'll be a new better me. Ill be strong enough, to hold up the two of us. Everyday I work on my life. I'm getting reorganized. I'm setting new goals, weeding out those who wouldn't help. It's been two years since we last really spoke. I miss your innocent laugh. It's now corrupted and forced. I miss your smiles, and the way you use to tackle me. I don't see you anymore either. We're both so busy. It's like neither of us exist. But it's alright. I'll see you soon. And when

Some days, you won't ever know I'm not okay. Living thousands of miles away, like a rough bay, you left me astray. Not knowing what to do, Wishing to have you, I tried to make it through. To be enough, It was tough, it was rough, and maybe I did bluff, but it was like a cuff. I couldn't escape. Wanting to reshape, nothing could free me. I was all alone. I just need you to know I love you.

It's like the world came crashing down all at once. Nothing could save me, it was surrounding me. Consuming me. I couldn't breathe. My thoughts raced, my heart pumped. Nothing calmed me. Nothing saved me. I needed a release. But nothing was there. The night was quiet, not a sound was made. It seemed nothing could save me anymore.

I don't think she realizes how much I cherish every text of her. She doesn't call me anymore.That's okay. I still have her messages to keep me sane. It's the littlest things that make me happy. The things that make me want to hold on. That do make me hold on. Oldest to newest: Wed. Feb. 15th 8:37: Well, I only say I love you when I mean it. Sun. Feb. 19th 3:29: Oh. Hey. I love you too. A lot. Okay. Yeah. Bye. Mon. Feb. 20th 8:45: Please tell V---- that you're my girl, not hers. Idk what eloping is, but I don't like the sound of it. Sun Feb. 26th 2:40: I care for you a lot more than I care about most people. Mon Feb. 27th 12:32: Naa

Some people are like hurricanes. They come unexpectedly, they come so quick. Some last for what seem forever, some disappear in seconds. But they all leave something behind. Maybe we didn't want them, such horrible timing it seems. Another roe in the bad luck. For others, the timing couldn't be more perfect. You needed change. Here comes the disaster, but the outcome is amazing. It can bring you new friends, it can bring you some hope. It can bring you things you didn't realize you had. Some people are like a hurricane. They come into your life in a flash, they cause some feelings, they cause some chaos. They leave in th

I didn't even know that it could get this way. Something fell apart the day you walked away. I wasn't the same since then. I had kept myself sane. I had kept myself distant, so I wouldn't be hurt. But you came, and I took my walls down. I let you in, I let you hold my heart. Look how that went. I thought to trust you, well, I guess I was wrong. Sometimes I just sit and remember. I felt so happy with you. I didn't want to die for the first time in ages. What happened? I had started to love you. And you left. I thought you were the one to save me.